Making the decision to want to be a surrogate is HUGE, and you are an earth angel for even considering it. Although it is a beautiful and wonderful thing, it can also be very complicated at times and you will definitely need some support. This will be hands down one of the most fulfilling things you will do, next to the birth of your own babies. Which is precisely why having the support of your tribe is going to be crucial! Broaching the subject will be the first step – remember that this is a lot for anyone to jump right on board with, so educating them and letting them ask questions and learn all about it will be the best way to navigate this.

How to talk to your partner about your desire to be a surrogate

Speaking to your main support person (spouse or partner) about your desire to be a surrogate is a conversation you should have once  YOU have decided this is something you want to do. Do not be surprised if you are met with a strong or harsh reaction – you have spent weeks researching, reading blogs and browsing facebook pages on this and you are really just putting it out there. Show your people some grace, and allow them the space to ask all their questions.  They will be entering this conversation with a lot of misconceptions based on their lack of knowledge – and it will suit  you best to share what you have learned, resources you have found and make a list of questions that they have that you may not have the answer to just yet.

It is important to have the support of your family

Pregnancy under any circumstances comes with its risks and it would be silly to think everyone would be instantly super supportive of you being pregnant… for a stranger! In order for your main support people to feel secure in your decision, you have to afford them the same respect you are requesting. Educate, educate, educate.

Each family member may have  their own concerns

I was lucky enough to have been able to slowly, ease into the conversation with all the people who mean the most to me – my parents were, of course, more concerned about what it meant for ME, once I provided them with the information I had available they took some time to do their own research and totally jumped on board. My in-laws on the other hand, 4 surrogacies later and I still think they believe I am some sort of baby smuggler, even though they have met the families and see the beauty of it all.

Your main support person will be someone you will need to share this information with sooner than later, but everyone else.. They can wait, and you can decide when you are ready to share. You know your tribe better than anyone else, test the waters… ask them what they know about it before you just blurt out your plan with excitement. Temper your expectations and do not let anyone steal your joy – what you are doing is LIFE CHANGING!!